Thursday, June 19, 2008

The British Museum Case - 7

Miriam had found a quiet street for us to appear on, and no-one saw us emerge from her magical portal. I led the way back towards the Museum entrance.
"Did your friend raise the mummies, or did the enemy?" I asked her pointedly.
"From what I saw, I think that it was the Morrigan, She is confused and afraid, she knows that she is the last of her kind, and she fears the enemy."
"WHY?" Scruff asked. "I mean, I know that this thing's got to be some kind of evil monster, but if your friend's really a powerful sorceress, why can't she just defeat it?"
"It too is possessed of great power," Miriam answered simply. "Its evil is beyond that of a mere man, and I fear that has confused the Morrigan."
"She's quite a nice girl really," Laura offered her opinion. "I met her in Cheltenham. A nice red-haired Irish girl. She LOOKED about sixteen, but Miriam said..."
"It is complicated," Miriam said simply.
Police thronged the forecourt of the Museum. I wasn't at all surprised. After all, mummies had just come to life inside the place. I recognised the car of Inspector Greenwell of the Weird Crimes unit of Special Branch. But I'm not exactly popular with the police, and Laura's Black Kitten persona is even less popular, ever since she set fire to a warehouse in Greenwich belonging to her Dad.

Scruff makes the most interesting friends.

"No way in," I reported.
"No," Miriam said quietly. "Not for you. But I can enter even a sealed room."
"We'll need to change our clothes," I warned.
"I can do that as well."
We hurried back to the alleyway, and there Miriam spoke a few words. Instantly our clothes were replaced by the costumes we wear when crime-fighting.
"And now we go in," the mysterious black-cloaked girl said seriously.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Emily's Inbox Revisited

Emily found this in her inbox this morning. As she doesn't have a bank account, being legally dead and really black and smoky, she showed it to me:
Greetings, I have interest of investing in your country as well as seek your services in a private and confidential matter. My Name is Mr.Bryant Morn, a senior Auditor heading computing department here in our bank. On my routine inspection I discovered a dormant domiciliary account with a Balance of ($14.02 Million USD}.I write to seek your indulgence and assistance in transferring this fund to your country through legal means. I am proposing to make this transfer to a designated bank account of your choice in your country for investment. At the conclusion of this transaction, you will be given 30% of the total amount, 70% will be for me and my Bank colleagues who will help make this business a success. Let me know if you can handle it.Regards,Bryant Morn .

We laughed, then tacked the man down and Emily persuaded him to turn himself in. She can be really scary when she wants to be. And she wants to be.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

My inbox revisited

Rising this morning and sitting down at the computer with Scruff and Emily (after I cleared three cats off the desk, keyboard and chair), I found that I had more scam mail:
From: Mr. Richard Klaus.
SA Post Office
P.O. Box 10 000
PRETORIA
0083 SOUTH AFRICA .

{MONEY TRANSACTION}
{THIRTY SIX MILLION USD}
(RE: TRANSFER OF $ 36,000,000.USD)
{BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY/YOUR ASSISTANCE IS NEEDED}

My Name is Mr. Richard Klaus. And I work in the International operation department in a Local Bank here in South Africa On a routine inspection, I discovered a dormant domiciliary account with a BAL Of 36,000,000 (Thirty Six Million USD) on further discreet investigation I also discovered that the account holder has long since passed away (Dead) leaving no beneficiary to the account The bank will approve this money to any foreigner because the former operator of the a/c is a foreigner and from Iraq in particular and I am certainly sure that he is dead and nobody will come again for the claim of this money A foreigner can only claim this money with legal claims to the account Holder therefore I need your cooperation in this transaction. I will provide the necessary information needed in order to claim this money, But you will need to open an account where this can be transferred. If you are interested send me your private Telephone No And Fax number including the full details of the account to be used for the Deposit. I wish for utmost confidentiality in handling this Transaction as my job and the future of my family would be jeopardized if it were breached The information will be as.
Follows:
Bank Name Address--------
A/C Name..........................
A/C Number Even an empty
A/c is still ok! ------------------
Swift Code No.....................
And i am assuring you that the transaction is risk free hence we are going to follow the normal transfer process. Finally a 25% of the total fund will be given to you for your steadfast corporation. Upon the receipt of the above details, payment will be activated by the feeding of your data into payment system, followed by a signal that will be sent to the paying bank to remit funds into your nominated bank account within 5 official working days of receipt of the above information. Contact me urgently via email privately for further details: { richardklaus200000@msn.com }
Thanks.
Yours Faithfully,
Mr. Richard Klaus.

If it looks too good to be true, it is. Especially as the man doesn't know who I am. In fact, if a bank employee really DID want to steal the contents of a dormant account, he'd use a friend as as accomplice, not a perfect stranger he'd contacted over the internet. So we did a little digging, and found the real sender of the e-mail. Emily slipped under his door one night, and terrified him half to death with a sword and her glowing red eyes. He's now in a nice cosy jail breaking rocks and being a useful member of society.

E-mail from the UN?



Checking her e-mail account this morning, Emily found this e-mail, which she decided to pass on (no, I'm not going to give her e-mail address. Let's just say it's blacksmokyoutsider@——.com). The e-mail claimed to come from the United Nations, but she had her doubts. Here it is:

Attn:Sir/ma,

How are you today and hope all is well with you and family?You may not understand why this mail came to you,but i will implore you to take your time to carefully go through this mail.

We have been having a meeting for the pass 7 months which ended 4 days ago at our office head quarters New York(UNITED NATIONS).

This email is to all the people that feel they have been scammed in any part of the world,the UNITED NATION have agreed to compensate them with the sum of US$ 150,000.This includes every foriegn contractors that may have not received their contract sum, and people that have had an unfinished transaction or international businesses that failed due to Government probelms etc.

We found your name in our list and that is why we are contacting you,this have been agreed upon and has been signed.

You are advised to contact Mr. Jim Ovia of ZENITH BANK NIGERIA PLC, as he is our representative in Nigeria, contact him immediately for your Cheque/International Bank Draft of USD$ 150,000. This funds are in a Bank Draft for security purpose ok? so he will send it to you and you can clear it at any bank of your choice.

Therefore, you should send him your full Name and telephone number/your correct mailing address where you want him to send the Draft to you.

Conatct:Mr. Jim Ovia immediately for your Cheque:
Person to Contact Mr. Jim Ovia
Email: jimovia00001@gmail.com

Thanks and God bless you and your family.Hoping to hear from you as soon as you cash your Bank Draft.

Making the world a better place

Regards,
Mr. Koffi Anann
Former Secretary (UNITED NATIONS).


Nigeria. How transparent can you get? Also the wording is all wrong for a real official e-mail. So we tracked down the man responsible, and Emily gave him a nice long talk on the subject of not scamming people. of course she had to hold his attention somehow, so she did it while shooting crossbow-bolts in a pattern around his head. The man is currently undergoing treatment in a mental hospital, gibbering about being tortured by a ghost. Emily maintains that she was just trying to keep his attention. I believe her, but she forgets that she looks scary to begin with.

Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.